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Thursday, October 23, 2008

Feerie by Van Cleef & Arpels

An attack of the doldrums, and the doldrums attack back

By Tom

First off, I do want to write that no, I didn't go to the Sniffa this past weekend in Los Angeles. Perhaps I've been too much of a gadabout what with me snuffling my way from Venice to The Village, or perhaps the purchase a plane ticket and an iPhone in the space of a month made me want to reign in my spending. Or perhaps (with apologies to the Karens, who I think put on a great show and deserve all accolades) I just didn't feel like sitting through a Givaudan presentation. Or perhaps I'm just grumpy having watched my 401k plummet to a 1k and am facing the fond notion that I will have to work until I'm 107 to pay off Visa. I did get some happy good perfume news in the form of some samples from Roxanne Villa, but her big new release "Chapparal" was forthcoming and I want to wait to try this new fragrance, inspired by Los Angeles and preceding the ones from Le Labo and LuckyScent by months.

Besides, this isn't one of those happy posts, this is grump city.

And this was a grumpy week.

Sometimes when one is grumpy, there is something or someone who will jump up and metaphorically wave their arms in your face yelling "Nanny Nanny Boo Boo". Usually it's some politi-whacko or Celebutart that merely makes we want to throw my remote or someone who decides that the "12 items or less/ Cash only" doesn't apply to them. Or it could be "Feerie", the new Van Cleef & Arpels scent, a sample of which apparently came with the latest Neimans Freebie. Thinking that I'd better get used to surviving on samples and cat food what with the state of the economy, I gave myself a decent spritz.

Holy synthetic berries Batman!

The card insert natters on about "captivating woody floral" and if you are willing to endure about an hour or two of the effect of being serve Cap'n Crunch with Crunch Berries, dry in a cheap diner on a cold morning by a waitress who thinks that her cheap rose cologne is covering up the fact she needs a shower and is sadly mistaken you sort of get there. There's a general coldness to the scent that makes the skank seem pretty far back, but still disagreeable. The end loses some of the berries and adds in some vague woods but there's nothing I find captivating. If I want the cereal thing I'll head for Lostmarc'h Laan-Ael, whose comforting milky cereal embrace makes Feerie seems like empty calories..

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Blogger Flora said...

Tom, what a disappointment from a quality house! That's the last thing I would have expected from them. Priceless scenario though, LOL! Next, the locust plagues and the rivers of blood, I guess - Van Cleef & Arpels has finally gone downmarket.

(I know how you feel about the 401K - I finally got up the courage to look up my account online last weekend and.. GACK! I hope I remember to ask if my customers "want fries with that.")

1:27 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Given that I find Captain Crunch revolting, I doubt that I'll be trying this soon:) How very sad for VC&A...I've always liked "First", but this sounds AWFUL.

I could live through my 401K being struck in two, but I don't think that I will be able to survive the next two weeks of this election. Everytime Sarah Palin opens her mouth I lose my will to live:)

8:43 AM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


Van Cleefs still makes excellent jewelry. That's something. And the bottle is very cute in person..

11:14 AM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


Don't get me started on the election. I'd like to be let loose at Neimans and Saks with just half what they spent on her...

11:15 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heh heh. I love it when you're grumpy. I'm sorry you didn't see the bottle in person, I would have loved to hear your thoughts. I'm not objecting to the whimsy, but I think it should have looked spendier coming from a jeweler -- the David Yurman looks like luxury, for instance -- good match for the brand. Feerie looks like Avon. About the juice, you said it all.

PS I refuse to look at our savings. I just watch my husband holding his head. -- March (commenting this way because my page is displaying oddly today)

11:52 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Le Tigre has a great Nanny Nanny Boo Boo song on their This Island cd, guaranteed to give you lots of loud crashy music to channel rage into at the same time as it forces you to dance in silly ways & smile.

And let's don't get me started on the Stepford Candidate ......

12:02 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know from grumpy. It's 25 degrees, dark outside (it's after 9 a.m.), and a lot of my work lately involves isolation wtih spots of writing and receiving nasty litigation letters and calls. But I have to say, the troubles of that woman lift my spirits. Check out to see the wardrobe pre-nomination. Wait a minute!!! I have a major laugh for everyone. See and watch the video of the "debate" involving the wanabee Sarah Palin candidate Lynda Placek. It's mind boggling. She's rocking the hair, the glasses and the red jacket, but she doesn't have the "amazing eloquence" of that woman. She belongs to a mega church. It's beyond the pale.

As for the feerie thing. I know you're grumpy when you took a pass on the obvious joke scenarios that could result fro mthe name and trade dress of this product!!


Your Alaskan Spy

1:13 PM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


Does it look bad in person? I would hope that it was nice but it could go either way. nice or like something that would be on hte hood of a mid-seventies Eldorado..

2:16 PM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...

le tigre! I have to hit iTunes tonight!

2:16 PM EDT  
Blogger elle said...

Am having a grumpy month, so I full appreciate a grumpy post. :-) I suspected that Feerie might smell like this - matches the *way* too twee name and bottle design. Fitting only for a 5 year old who really does enjoy dry Crunch Berries.

2:49 PM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


That link is too funny! The Dem guy looks like a local gadfly John Walsh ( with the loud shirt and the combover and Placeck looks like Palin if she'd slept in her clothes!

4:48 PM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


I think a lot of us are having a grumpy month..

4:49 PM EDT  
Blogger NowSmellThis said...

Love the Cap'n Crunch comparison -- thanks for the laugh!

6:27 PM EDT  
Blogger ginamused said...

hahaha! had a mouthful of cap'n crunch, yes, with crunch berries when i read your review. lmao:)
ps, i really enjoy your writing.

11:51 PM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


thanks for all the laughs you've given me!

3:42 PM EDT  
Blogger tmp00 said...


It really makes me want to go and get some capn crunch!

3:43 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I really enjoy reading your posts. I may not comment very often but I’m one of your regular readers. I bookmark your site, but I should have subscribed to your feed instead so I won’t miss a thing. Very funny

Make Homemade Fragrances

5:57 AM EDT  

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