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Tuesday, December 23, 2008

What to Give for Christmas to the Over-Applier?

By Tom

This post will turn out to be perhaps a rhetorical question, since I think it'll be posted to late to take the suggestions, but I think it's a good thing to ask.

I have at least one friend who is a chronic over-applier. One friend, a woman I'll call Rita, is of the mantra more is more. She'll approach the perfume counter boldly, spray her ample poitrine and graceful, swanlike neck until it's glistening like a freshly dunked donut and writhe in olfactory ecstasy. Now if she reaches for something like, cay Eau d'Hadrien we're safe. But Rita likes bad-girl scents like Westwood's Boudoir or the original Agent Provacateur, scents that could be used to clear hostage situations if they could be had at a price-point less than tear gas. She however isn't my problem. Luckily, she's into body creams, so I can rely on something from Bliss or Carol's Daughters that will make her soft and happy.

My problem is the husband of one of best friends, who I'll call Biff. His wife is one of us, and he's started, but hasn't quite mastered the application part of the program yet. Apparently he woke his wife one morning from a deep sleep into eye-watering, coughing consciousness by his criminal over-application of Guerlain Vetiver. Which was my birthday gift to him. A gift given 4 months ago. 100MLs of it. Now Biff wants more, but his wife has begged that either I give him something lighter, like vaguely scented air or give him application lessons.

My other sticking point is price. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I don't feel like spending $200 dollars on this when A) There's a chance he'll just spray it like it was Glade and B) I'm don't really want to spend more than $40. So where am I on this? CKOne? Gendarme? Thoughts?

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24 Comments:

Blogger Monkey said...

For a nice anise/vetiver that won't kill over-applied I suggest Kenzo Air. After that I would try some eaux: Guerlain Eau du Coq or Hermes Eau d'Orange Vert.

Happy Holidays!

9:12 AM EST  
Anonymous dea said...

What about Dior Eau Savage (is that right?) it has a similar vibe and much less sillage & staying power. Or maybe Terre d'Hermes?

cheers! ~~dea

9:15 AM EST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Caron Pour Un Homme is fairly transparent and dissipates fast... It seems that poor Biff needs some application tips more then he needs the cologne, though.
Nika

9:27 AM EST  
Blogger ScentScelf said...

I'm practically ROTFL over the Vetiver shower...but let's stop and consider for a moment. Usually, perfumistas are busy confessing that they have TOO MUCH juice, that they know they'll get even more (perhaps before the day is out), and this despite knowing they aren't likely to use up what's in the closet.

Biff does seem to have found a way around this problem. Perhaps we should allow him to embrace life? (Of course, embracing him might be difficult...)

9:45 AM EST  
Blogger ScentScelf said...

Incidentally, my recommendation would be Eau de Imperiale (Guerlain). You can find it at decent prices online, and it is after all a migraine remedy.... ;)

9:46 AM EST  
Blogger Existentialist said...

Anything in a splash bottle (can't be sprayed).

12:14 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

Monkey-

Great ideas, thanks!

2:31 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

dea-

I thought about Eau Sauvage, but thought that in the high doses Biff is capable of that would be too much. The man managed to gas someone out with Gerlain Vetiver, after all...

2:32 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

Nika-

He does. But how?

2:32 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

scentscelf-

His wife will allow him to embrace life as soon as he moves his cologne out to the garage.

2:34 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

eau Imperiale! Good one!

2:40 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

Existentialist

Believe it or not, he was using a splash bottle...

2:42 PM EST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If he's religious give him a bottle of holy water ;-)

4:00 PM EST  
Blogger Mary said...

Alrighty, then! I truly understand the problem. Some of the edgier fragrances certainly can be over-applied. My solution (drum-roll, please!) is Avon's latest release: Unscripted. Now, before you wrinkle your (collective) noses, understand that I am a Vetiver afficianado (and Vetiver farmer, actually) and collect and use Vetiver/Vetyver/Khus fragrances and those with Vetiver as their prominent note. I also do NOT sell Avon products. I have, however, eagerly awaited the release of Unscripted, given its description. Avon finally released it in November. Mine arrived last week, and I love it! In fact, the seamless blend of its Lavender, Vetiver and Cedar notes is so delicious, that I wish it lasted LONGER than an hour or two. Frankly, I don't think that this fragrance CAN be over-applied!! Just my two scents worth...

4:36 PM EST  
Anonymous Flora said...

I agree with ScentSelf on the Guerlain - but now I am really curious about the new Avon - after all it IS being promoted by Dr. McDreamy, how bad could it be? :-D

6:06 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

Anon-

Were he Catholic I would!

8:52 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

Mary-

I have nothing against Avon, I just don't know anyone who sells it. I kind of wish I did so I could try some of the skincare, which are supposed to be really good

8:54 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

D-

I think I'd seriously consider wearing gasoline if he'd POTL to come over and apply it.

8:55 PM EST  
Blogger Beth Gehring said...

How about 4711 eau de cologne which if he over-applies just smells really light and orange watery. It's got some history so it could be a teaching gift without giving away your true motives:)

11:10 PM EST  
Blogger tmp00 said...

Beth-

That's the one I first thought of but his wife nixed it for some reason. I think she didn't want him to have something that was that light

12:19 PM EST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kiehl's Original Musk. No matter how much he sprays, it will stay close enough to the skin and it's unoffensive to most noses, even when over-applied. And it retails for under $40, while still maintaining class. Anything that could be considered an appropriate base when layering is probably a safe bet.

7:44 PM EST  
Blogger annavoxpopuli said...

I go with the Hermes suggestions for any overapplier. :)

5:28 AM EST  
Anonymous March said...

Too late for you too, but I have the same problem with my husband. He almost killed me with my first two gifts, I think D&G and Gucci II.

So you need something that reads like water (can't promise you less than $40 though.) Prada Iris? One of those Kenzos, like Monkey suggested? How about a splash bottle of 4711? Then he'll only smell for nine minutes. Those Guerlains (Imperiale, Coq, they're different, right?) are just fancy 4711....

Just read all the way down, no such thing as too light with this guy. Plus you can get a 200 ml bottle for, like, $40.

3:56 PM EST  
Blogger BlackAmberMoon said...

How about Bvlgari pour homme or Extreme? You just can't overdo them, yet they have character.

9:09 PM EST  

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