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Friday, October 21, 2011

The Colours Out of Space: Pentachords by Tauer Perfumes

by Marla (or is it??)

H. P. Lovecraft wrote his personal favorite sci-fi short story, “The Colour Out of Space” in 1927. It’s about an alien (perhaps) who arrives in a meteor (maybe) and proceeds to destroy the countryside around its landing site by dint of a peculiar “colour”, an analogy for some sort of energy that does not exist on Earth. Now this story is a horror story, but if we can imagine Colours Out of Space that don’t feed on our life energy and destroy us, but merely change us in an olfactory manner, leaving us neither better nor worse, only different, then Tauer’s Pentachords could come directly from that meteorite. The original and frighteningly talented Mr. Tauer wanted to make wholly synthetic odors of 5 aromamolecules each. No naturals could be used, because each natural component is composed of many different aromachemicals. He was looking for some sort of alien purity, obviously. Maybe, down in his cold, stone laboratory deep in the Alps, he still is….

From benign to terrifying, I’ll rank my mini-reviews:

The Fluffy Cloud Alien: White freaked me out briefly at first with its synthetic blast of some substance I can’t quite name. Within 90 seconds, it had settled on my skin to become the Best Marshmallow Ever. But it’s a very big, scary marshmallow. Remember Mr. Stay-Puft from “Ghostbusters”? Big marshmallow. I really love White, though, and I’m considering a bottle of it. Some days it’s just a lovely Ms. Stay-Puft with a mere hint of malice in those enormously sweet, comfy eyes….

The Burning Crater in the Orchard: Auburn sometimes pleases and sometimes alarms me. It’s fiery, but not an earthly fire. It’s something made by Some Thing that burnt up in our atmosphere. The remnants land on your skin, and your skin starts to change. It’s hot, that’s for sure….

The Ancient One: Verdant just freaks me out. It’s the most Lovecraftian of the trio, and I’ve worn it a few times, but I’m afraid if I keep wearing it, I will also begin to glow in that Colour Out of Space. Or start chanting for Cthulhu to return. Sure, it’s green, I guess that’s the best analogy. Just be warned before you try it on, it doesn’t leave your brain. Even if you hate it (and I don’t), you won’t forget it, and you’ll start wondering exactly what’s in that vial, and if it’s really gone….

So I’m hoping that Mr. Tauer tries a few more colors for the Pentachords collection, but not until next Halloween, please. These 3 are making my skin glow just fine.

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Blogger Carrie Meredith said...

Earlier this year it was my intention to do a Lovecraft blogging project involving perfume, but it never happened, so I was totally tickled to see this! Maybe if it ever does happen, you'll be kind enough to join me. :)

1:17 AM EDT  
Blogger Persolaise said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

1:59 AM EDT  
Blogger Persolaise said...

You went for Lovecraft, I went for Bjork. They're not light years apart, are they...?

2:00 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This review is hitting the nail on the head for me! I am also more than a little outweirded by the Pentachords. Interesting, but ultimately too far from comfortable for me to ever wear them regularly.

4:49 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're on, thanks!

6:40 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd already used my refs to favorite Bjork songs in my review of L'Artisan's Nuit de Tubereuse, and, hey, it's October. Glad to see another Bjork fan here!

6:42 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We're together on this one as usual!

6:43 AM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear museinwoodenshoes,
I'm pretty fascinated with Pentachords, actually, though as Olfactoria says, I can't see myself wearing them too often. They are worth a sniff if you get a chance, that's for sure.

9:40 AM EDT  
Anonymous Flora said...

Marla, what a marvelous approach to a review, I loved it! Now I am even more eager to try the Pentachords...I think.

4:15 PM EDT  
Anonymous Flora said...

Marla, what a marvelous approach to a review, I loved it! Now I am even more eager to try the Pentachords...I think.

4:15 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Flora, I'd love to know your take on them!
They are truly unique.

4:42 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lovecraft and perfume, my two favorite things! Never thought I'd see them together like this, thanks!


12:54 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Nightporter,
I never thought I'd combine a review of a Lovecraft story and perfumes, but Andy Tauer is a true original, and it happened! I highly recommend trying all 3 Pentachords.

4:41 PM EDT  

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