The End of Affair
 I like to think that, when it comes to human relationships, I am a pretty steadfast individual. As far as romance is concerned, I am actually someone who falls in love once and for all. I certainly strongly believe in monogamy. As far as my relationship with perfumes is concerned, that is, sadly, not the case. I was surveying my perfume cabinet recently, and it looked like a Scent Cemetery. So many of the scents there were basically dead for me. I had no love left for them, no interest; they were actually a little repulsive to me.I am not talking here of silly little flings and one night stands- scents I never really loved, but certainly liked enough to buy. It doesn’t pain me to see those in my collection (although I do feel a little guilty for not spending money instead on something I loved rather than liked). I am talking here of the scents that I absolutely adored and thought I would love forever. I obsessed about them, incessantly talked about them, wrote rave posts about them, lemmed them, bought them…and now the love is gone. The scents have not changed; they are, objectively speaking, as wonderful now as they were then. As cliché as that phrase is, it’s not them, it’s me! I haven’t over-worn them (I hardly ever wear the same scent several times in a row), so I am not tired of them. I haven’t over-sprayed them (I am usually an under-applier), so I am not sick of them. Nothing dramatic happened to make me stop loving them. There is no explanation of why I don’t love them anymore. It seems that, as with human love, there is often no rational (or any) reason of why love ends. The sparkle goes out, and that is that. So let me share with you the sad list of my formerly adored exes: Bond No 9 Chinatown Caron Farnesiana Donna Karan Chaos Escada Collection Etro Heliotrope Givenchy Organza Indecence Guerlain L’Heure Bleue Hermes Ambre Narguile I Profumi di Firenze Talco Delicato Jo Malone Pomegranate Noir L’Artisan Dzongkha Laura Tonatto Safram Les Parfums de Rosine Un Zest de Rose Lubin Idole Serge Lutens Rahat Loukoum The Different Company Jasmine de Nuit YSL Nu Presently in Love Quarantine (because sometimes love disappears with no warning, whereas in some cases, I can feel a sort of a faint nagging of disillusionment beforehand): Frederic Malle Musc Ravageur L’Artisan Orchidee Blanche and Safran Troublant Shiseido Feminite du Bois And yet, even though monogamy is not possible for me where perfumes are concerned, there are scents in my life that I have worn for years and still love truly, madly, deeply: Poison, Coco, Marina de Bourbon, Climat, to name just a few. Perhaps only time can truly tell Love apart from Infatuation. Be it perfumes or people, infatuation burns brightly and feels intense; and then one morning you wake up and feel nothing and can’t even understand how you could have felt what you felt. True love, on the other hand, lasts forever. Do you have scents that you adored and then suddenly stopped loving? Please share! |
posted by Marina |
12:03 AM
74 Comments:
I don't think I've ever fallen out of love with something I really adored. The closest I've come is L'Artisan L'eau du navigateur, which I thought I really liked and quickly bought a bottle of, but almost never wear. Usually, I take a long time to fall in love with something in the first place, so I guess I have plenty of time to change my mind if it's not destined to be.
Erin,
Ah, but I fall in love like that *snaps fingers* And even the scents whom it took me a long while to appreciate (Feminite) are apparently not safe. It's tragic, really.
(Navigateur and me, on the other hand, are foverer. I am quite sure of it) :-)
Yes, there are a few. Padparadscha is one that I thought was just fabulous but I just doesn't do anything for me anymore. There's a half bottle of Boucheron Homme Eau de parfum that sits sadly on the perfume shelf in the closet, right at the front (right at the front is not the power position in earthquake country: that's the back, where the bell jars live, safely in their boxes held with Earthquake putty). I hate to say this, but the last time I wore Chergui I sort of had a deeply "meh" reaction to it, but I am hoping that was just a bad smell day. I even just spritzed on a tiny bit of the Boucheron, thinking something that lovely, something that I got when I spent serious money on merely needed a reminder to rekindle that love. Not quite.
Like you, I am the most monogamous make to an actual human: as a lover I will never stray (I might look, though) and as a friend, well. my dearest friends range in duration from just one decade (two pwople) to well into three (three people). I am however a perfume whore: I will fall madly, deeply in love with a fragrance and one day wake up and realise that I just don't care anymore. I will without compunction gift it, give it or perfume the sofa with it, and even (in the case of the nifty aluminum CK-one refillable twist-up spray bottle) use the departed's cannisters to decant my new loves.
PS- you know where you can send that Rahat Loukoum. Want some Boucheron? You can spray it on DH!
Dear Columbina,
I can so relate to you .with your perfume graveyard. However, as we speak I am in a Guerlain L'Heure Bleue state of ecstasy ! The more sophiticated my sense of smell or taste became - ..the more vintage I became. I know what you mean. Climat, Coco , Poison, Opium. Paloma Picasso, Miss Dior ,Oscar De la Renta. Chanel No. 5- these are classics of which I never tire.
As I just bought Musc Ravageur last may, it is still new to me.
I am over Chantecaille Frangipani, and Velvet Rope, though I bought them ariund this time last year. I adore La Chasse Aux Papillons, Organza, Beautiful, Joy Annick Goutal Passion, Gucci Rush.but my love is fading ..
I think part of the problem lies in the allure of perfume itself. Fragrance is memory, memory is fragrance. Good or bad, happy or sad.
So many scents, so little time . i ready to moe on and want to feel a jolt, a WoW when I spray or gently tenderly apply an extrait de parfum. For that is whay I use parfum - to get an uplift , nit a been there . done that !
I
Tom,
Sorry, Rahat has been auf'd, it was told to pack its, uh, dabber and go, I told him, see ya later, uh...no, can't rhyme to save my life. :-)
I haven't tried Boucheron pour homme. After experiencing the nuclear power of it's feminine counterpart, I decided not to touch anything that firm produces, ever again...unless it's jewelry.
Madelyn,
I envy you. L'Heure Bleue was the one that sort of split up with me rather than the other way round. It stopped loving me. :-(
Violet Rope was definitely a one night stand type of a scent for me. One day I thought I needed a huge $75 bottle, the next I was ashamed of those thoughts :-) I get lots of anise from it, don't know if it's actually supposed to be there.
Ah... I can't say I'm a particularly faithful woman when it comes to men or scents. Though with a man, I'm slightly more inclined to monogamy, at least over a few years! In my graveyard, the one scent I was exclusively devoted to for 10 years (more than to any man): Habanita. I can't wear it for the life of me. It actually makes me queasy. All the Carons that succeeded it are in purgatory. Can't do the base anymore. I've found that what kills a scent for me is to be kept out of rotation for so long that it becomes associated with a particular period in the past. However, unlike men, perfumes can be kept in a dark closet to be revisited.
I can't think of any fragrances in my collection that I've completely fallen out of love with, but every once in a while I'll realize that I no longer have the urge to wear one, no matter how much I like it. The most recent example was La Chasse aux Papillons. I loved to smell it, but I just never wore it for some reason. It's in a better home now.
Your poor heaving shelves M!
I don't think I ever fall out of love... instead, I think I'm in love, convince myself I am, and then a few days later realise how silly I've been. I've become a much more cautious perfume buyer (unless it's an eBay bargain) because of the amount of stuff I've shifted over the past year (via the same bargain means). So, my slutabout scents include Mechant Loup (a bit of a tease at first, but something queasy about him in the long run), Gucci pour Homme (fundamentally dull), and Kyoto (too confident in his abilities to seduce).
Long term loves from your list are Ambre Narguilé (I absorb all the sugar and I'm just left with the most beautiful blond tobacco), l'Heure Bleue (melancholy perfection), Dzongkha (a slow burner scent - at first it was just quirky, now it's dishy and charming).
Post from a looong time lurker: this is the loveliest comment i read from you, sentimental & slightly sad - lovely. Like balsam for my Eastern European soul - thank you Colombina.
I loved Chanels's Allure - and it's gone now, it's off. Once it was love with Angel - now I get sick of it. Then I had a long time marriage with Miyake - the worst thing : i don't even hate it now, i just don't care about it...
I'm in a constant on/off relationship with Dzonghka - it's my bad boy.
It looks like an eternal flirt with JoMalone's Grapefruit (an affair for every summer...)
And right now i'm having a long curtship with Mecheri's Hanae...
Love quarantine...what a great phrase!
I've linked you to my blog, as I love this site!
www.savvythinker.com
Out of love ?
Probably some L'Artisans, like Premier Figuier, Mure et Musc- Eau D'Issey for sure [yes, it's really me- I loved it when it was released, but want to puke now !] !
JFF, and the original Tocca.
By and large, if I really loved them, I still do.
If I overdid them, it's not their fault...
I am a slattern, though, that's a fact- sigh.
What an interesting post. I wonder if I've fallen out of love with anything; even the things I'm technically *in* love with don't get taken out to dinner very much, because I'm too busy putting some new atrocity on. You are right -- I am fixed firm in my human loves, absurdly fickle in my fragrance ones. Trying to think... okay, Bond Noho is one. Actually, I fell out of love with the whole note (linden) having found several things. Creed Angelique Encens I had delusions about being "my" scent (ha!) until the day I woke up and realized I loathed it.
Wow--that's a long list, partially accounted for by the fact that your tastes have become less sweet, and you overdosed on saffron:). I'm mourning the loss of Chaos from your loves, though. . .
I don't think I've changed quite as much, but some of mine overlap with yours
--Laura Tonatto Safram (+ less interest in L'Art Safran Troublant)
--Chinatown (although I always loved the bottle more than the scent:)
--on Tom's, Sat Pap (just less interesting)
--with Amy, la chasse (similar feelings, though I haven't parted with it yet)
and on my very own:
--Divine Bergamote (got too orangey)
from earlier years (might be some skin chemistry change here):
--Hadrien (started smelling like lemon pledge)
--Hypnotic Poison (I adored this when it first came out, but it now seems sickly sweet to me (I can rescue it, however, by putting on an overlay of 10 CC; voila--Hypnotic Corso Como).
Well, I guess that is a lot, after all!!
"Scent Cemetary" - LOVE that!!! :-) I so know the feeling. I long ago accepted I am a total sl*t when it comes to fragrances. There are a few I return to year after year, but most end up sitting forlornly and unnoticed in my scent harem. Why don't I get rid of them? Because there is *always* the chance that on the 3rd blue moon of the 5th month of the 9th year I will NEED that perfume. NEED it like a drug that I will die w/out. Just for one day.
Oh, and should any oligarchs or weatlthy mafiosos out there be reading all this talk of personal monogamy and be getting discouraged at finding someone to have an affair w/ and shower the new Chanels and Tom Fords on...PLEASE. I'm still available. I have no scruples. DH *will* understand the financial necessity here.
This may sound like blasphomy, but I fell out of love with Opium, nearly every Givenchy that exists except for Eau de Givenchy, Givenchy III and Ysatis.
Agent Provocateur broke up with me - sob! I miss it so. I keep a bottle for old times sake. I have had flings with a few Jo Malones and then heartlessly left them citing boredom.....
D,
Oh yes, when a scent becomes associated with a particular (especially bad) period in my life, I cannot wear it anymore. But at least then I know why I don't love it anymore, you know? While with these scents, I just have no idea.
Amy,
Sorry to hear about La Chasse. I didn't use to like it, but it is growing on me.
Leopoldo,
Mechant Loup and I are having a tiresome on/off love/hate affair. Everything is wonderful about it, but,a s you said, there is something there that makes queasy once in a while.
Lady Jane Grey,
Welcome! Where in Eastern Europe, if I may ask? :-) Dzongkha was such a huge love for me at first and the it started to annoy me for no explicable reason :-(
Dear Anonymous,
Thank you for your kind words.
Chaya,
I can't believe you loved L'Eau d'Issay...in my mind, it's so...not you! :-)
March,
Some new atrocity - LOL. Very true. I am a little less passionate about Angelique Encens than I used to be, but it is not quite in Quarantine yet.
J,
So you did use to wear Hadrien? Was it Eau or Nuits? Never say never, of course, but I think I can tentatively call Eau d'Hadrien True Love. It's been with me for a while now.
L,
To invoke another Stephen King book, Sometime They Come Back...but it hasn't happened to me yet. When a scent dies for me, it pretty much stays dead. :-)
Where ARE all the oligarchs when one needs them?!
Flor,
After I realized that I don't love Farnesiana and Chaos anymore...nothing sounds like blasphemy to me, believe me :-)
Donanicola,
Sorry to hear that! Sadly, I could never wear the original AP. I do love Eau Emotionnelle though...so far :-)
I wear my "regulars" so rarely that it is hard to get sick of anything. I need to seriously stop buying perfume altogether.
Very surprised by some of the things on your list though!
Diorissimo is now my longest love, so perhaps that is who I'll be with in the end ;-)
R,
The list surprised me too, when I put it together...shocked me, even :-(
I started my "perfume career" wearing Poison, and I'll probably go to grave smelling of it :-)
This post makes me so sad...and afraid. I am afraid I will stop loving my true loves (I am, of course, talking about perfume). I pray that day never comes.
M,
This has been happening to me all my life, and this list is simply the most recent one. So if you have never experienced such sudden falling out of love with you favorite scents, perhaps you never will!
Unfortunately for my pocketbook, I am very fickle. I can't actually remember too many I have fallen out of love with, because approximately every two to three years, I stick them all in an open box and go visiting. Dear Child gets first option, then my sister, then my mother, then it goes to work.
It appears to be about time for another trip with the box because I am running out of room on the shelves. I don't hate anything up there, but if I have to choose, the Bulgari Eau The Verte, Origins Ginger Essence, Banana Republic Classic, Philosophy The Fragrance (okay, I hate that one), Tiramani (can't remember who makes that), Fresh Bergamot Citrus and Honeysuckle Grapefruit, La Maison de la Vanille Kilikao, L'Artisan La Chasse aux Papillons,....I need a bigger box.
Dear Gail,
Next time you are on the road with The Box, please, feel free to visit :-D
Very interesting post! I have found that as soon as I fall out of love, I get rid of the bottle. Of course this backfires because eventually I will doubt myself and buy it again. I have given away L'artisan's Navigateur, Premier Figuier, Voleur de Roses (what was I thinking?) and the first two I bought again and love! I still want a bottle of VR. I think it has to do with the shame I feel for spending so much money! It's just easier to remove the evidence!!!
I gave away four bottles in January. I gave away Gucci Pour Homme (pineapple and incense on me, yuck!), CSP Kumquat Alhambra (sweet, sweet mandarine orange...that's all it was), CDG's Calamus (now that might have been a mistake except it was almost undetectable on me), CSP's Safranier, ooops and I forgot about Joop! Nightflight (which turned into the most sickeningly sweet musk).
I guess I am a scent slut as well. Love 'em and leave em... There are so many fish in the sea and bottles on the shelves!
Kelley,
Navigateur! If you ever fall out of love with it again (and i hope it never happens!!), I will provide a very loving home to the poor pirate :-) See, this never happens to me, unfortunately, for me, if love is gone, it's gone! :-(
Hello Colombina! This is my first comment but I read your blog religiously! So sad to fall out of love with fragrances - and sometimes more so because after a break, when you smell them again they can tear your heart, reminding you of a time in your life etc. That doesn't happen with your 'true love' fragrances because they are with you through everything! Sad to see Musc Ravageur and Feminite du Bois on the list (or in quarantine) – thought you and they were in it for the long haul! I’ve fallen out of love with Santal Blanc, Bvlgari The Verte, Shalimar Light, Un Bois Vanille, Eau de Charlotte and L’heure Bleue. The latter I can hardly bear to admit.
My Scent Cemetary includes one that's on your list: Organza Indecence. I was madly in love with OI, and right after I got a bottle, I promptly fell out of love with it. I try it every once in a while hoping to get that spark again. Sigh, I think It Was Not Meant To Be.
What a lovely melancholy post!
I'm too much of a perfume newbie to be able to claim that I've fallen out of love (with perfume, that is), except with things that belong so much to the far distant past, and are so embarrassing, that I can only claim that I didn't know any better at the time (Ombre Rose comes to mind . . . or Je Reviens, which I still love for the memories it invokes, but which has become, shall we say, tedious to one who appears to have the skin chemistry for which Serge Lutens designs . . .)
But . . . I'm semi-de-lurking because of your lost passion for Feminite. The same thing happened to me. I fell passionately in love with it when it first came out. Couldn't believe it, actually -- I was naive enough about perfume never to have realized that it could smell like this. I stayed in love for YEARS. And then, it simply went away. The love, I mean, not the Feminite. And then . . . it came back! Less than a year ago, in fact. And Feminite is how I found this blog, since during the years I was out of love it had been removed from the American market, and so I had to go a-hunting on the web.
But that's another story . . .
Mimi,
Welcome! It hurts me to admit that I don't love L'Heure Bleue too :-( And I also thought Feminite and MR were The Ones for me. Perhaps if I leave them in Quarantine for a while and don't touch them at all...perhaps the love will return.
Iris,
Funny how often the loves goes as soon as we get the bottle of the lemmed for scent...
Jennifer,
Well, I am thankful to Feminite that it lead you here :-) I don't think you should be embarrassed about loving Ombre Rose or Je Reviens in the past. They are wonderful scents, it is simple that you must have moved on from them...on to Lutens :-)
Pretty much everything on your list plus DelRaes, most Nicolais, Bonds.
Ina,
I am still very much in love with DelRaes and Niolais, but of the Bonds I now like only the last two most recent ones...
Tell me about it, girl...
THAT'S when 'aquatic' was brand new, and NO ONE wore it.
Oh, and it was summer...
Jesus, the truth hurts, don't it ?
Well, everyone needs something to live down !
Chaya,
A certain Inochka Aromascopovna has the same dark, aquatic secret in her past :-)
Shhh, don't say such things. They'll hear you, fumes are sensitive. I stubbornly refuse to wear the last dregs in a beloved bottle. If I happen to try it again years later and it doens't suit, I pretend that the juice has turned.
Victoria (BoisdeJasmin):
I always thought that Pomegranate Noir smelled like Christmas potpourri. :) On a more serious note, I find that I change my mind drastically only very rarely. Then again, with few exceptions, it takes me a while to fall in love. I have to wear a fragrance for at least a week on daily basis to make up my mind. Sometimes it takes even longer (ie, Insolence).
P.S. Sorry for the anon, but Blogger keeps logging me out, and it is such a pain to sign in every single time I want to comment.
I used to wear Eau d'Hadrien, and I absolutely adored it. This was quite some time ago, and I don't know if my skin changed (accentuating all citrus) or if I simply didn't notice that it smelled like Lemon Pledge on me (a fact confirmed by a disconcerted AG SA who wrinkled up her nose when I put it on; Nuits is not significantly better on me).
Listening to you and March, I am anxious about my Angelique Encens. I haven't given up on it, but I have noticed that I haven't been reaching for it as much, and that I enjoy it a little less; still. . . .
Well, if Orchidee Blanche falls onto your former-love list, please let me know! I will happy to buy it and give it a very happy home! - minette
Whataworld,
They are indeed very sensitive *covers the sensitive ears of her bottles* :-)
Vika,
(Stupid blogger! UGH)
It took me a long while to fall in love with Feminite du Bois, and that still didn't seem to save it from me starting to fall out of love with it :-( Pom Noir just became incredibly sharp and strong on my skin. For a Malone scent, it has incredible lasting power too :-)
Judith,
Yep, that's how it starts...with a little less enjoyment...I hope it won't be Splitsville for you and AE!!
Minette,
I will try my hardest to stay in love with Orchidee, but should the worst happen, I will remember what you said! :-)
Colombina, you asked me some 40 comments ago (4:26), where am I from. I left Hungary 16 years ago.
Love,
Lady Jane Grey
Lady Jane,
Can I just say how much I love Budapest (haven't been to other places in Hungary, unfortunately). I've been there 3 times and had the most wonderful time of my life each time.
Mine is on your list - Escada Collection. It was a deep, burning love that I felt sure would last forever! I went through samples and a decant (which usually takes some doing for me, as I'm not a big spritzer) and bought a bottle. And after wearing it a few times from the bottle, the love just up and died.
Suddenly the tuberose and jasmine, which had always been nearly nonexistent on me, roared into the foreground and refused to leave. I tried. I *tried*. But it was like that boyfriend whose irritating laugh kinda bothered you initially (but you never heard it so often that it was a problem) suddenly found the entire world hilarious, and he would not shut up. The last time I tried to reconcile with Collection, it actually made me feel nauseous.
Luckily, unlike old boyfriends, lost perfume loves can sometimes be turned over for a decent profit :~D
Trina,
Wouldn't it be nice if we *could* turn old BFs to profit...:-) Well, I guess we could write bestselling horror novels about them :-)
wow, M, that was definitely one of your most surprising entries for me. there are some perfumes on your list that I associated so strongly with you that it will be hard to *disconnect* the two of you apart. I was simply taken aback when I read some of them, e.g. Chinatown, Ambre Narguile, Musc Ravageur (!!! still haven't quite got it, I'm afraid ;-)), Idole, Safrant Troublant and Orchidee Blanche...
for me, it's very difficult to part from a perfume I once loved, I guess I'm being sentimental. but some of them had to go, like Kiehl's Musk, L'Occitane Eau des Vanniliers and Chinatown. we just didn't have a future... ;-)
Oh, Tina,
Chinatown for you too?? I am so sorry :-(
Patty,
Yeah..Nazgul :-) I too never wear the same scent many times in a row, and it still this happens :-(
Oh, I never liked Chinatown, and I'm mean about it. It gives me a little thrill to see people fall out of love with it. I'm too new to have fallen out of love with anything, but I have realized that infatuation was just like in a few cases, like with Loukhoum or LT's Iss. Oh well.
P,
I am the same way with POTL. :-) I watch like a hawk for posts about people falling out of love with it (doesn't happen often, sadly), and then I snicker happily. :-)
Oh, such a well thought out and provocative post, colombina! You are not alone, my dear. I definitely concur and will list my RIP fragrances:
Dunhill Desire
Bvlgari Pour Femme
Bvlgari Blu
J. Lo Live
Givenchy Hot Couture
V'Tae Sensuality
My practicality will trump my emotions for sure! I cannot stand to waste so I will finish these bottles and/or swap them. :-)
T,
I used to love Hot Couture too, several years ago...for a duration of a month or two -) Fickle, fickle!
wow... i thought i was the only one that did this as i now cannot stand any serge lutens... NONE... i've since emptied many a bell jar down the drain... yeah i know i should've passed them on but it was such closure to just DUMP them down the drain... i also cannot stand andy's work any more... andy tauer that is... his stuff is just so cloying... call me fickle... and wasteful ($$$)... and yeah i'm angry... it's just that nothing strikes my fancy anymore... nothing haunts me... maybe i should just go back to my teenage british sterling moment when everything was so carnaby street and wonderful... even eau d'italie's a bore... i'm in trouble
Don't despair, ladies and gents! Me, I wore Guepard by Guepard. Loved it. Raved about it. Recommended it to all and sundry. And one morning I was so sick of it, I gave the remains of my third bottle away and never thought of it. Last year, some 15 or so years later, I got this sudden urge to smell it again (of course it wasn't available any more) and moved heaven and hell to get some. And I love it again. Sort of. Like meeting your ex after many a year and suddenly remembering why you fell in love with him in the first place and wondering why the heck you fell out of love anyway. I don't wear Guepard often these days, but I'm happy to own a bottle. Love became disillusionment and has now become friendship. I wish relationships worked out like that!
Robespierre,
Bell Jars down the drain...it hurts me to read that :-)
D,
My problem is - and this does not reflect nicely on me, I know- is that I have never been able to stay friends with exes. I am never nasty to them or anything, it's just that when it's over, it's over for me, you know? :-) Somehow I think it is the same with me and perfumes :-(
I used to adore Diors Opium, now I can not stand it.
Sadie,
Me too! :-(
i am cursed with falling in love fast, hard, and near-endlessly with far too many things. people and perfume are two of them. what *does* happen to me is that i smell the perfume on someone else and it is far MORE heavenly, and then i feel self-conscious about it. it's one of those "i love you, but you love that person more than me..." situations. Mechant Loup and Damien Bash Lucifer #2 were two of those, discovered close together. i have a friend on whom Mechant Loup smells SO much more amazing, and as a wolf person, i kind of resented that ;) i still love it, but gave it up so that i'm not constantly *reminded* of it. ;)
Risa,
How dare he, Mechant Loup, smell better on someone else! :-) Such a heartbreaker, that one.
Robespierre, such atrocity to hear bell jars down the drain! :-)
my scent graveyard mostly consists of some discounter and department store scents i thought i loved until i moved on to greater things....
in particular: ralph lauren's romance. poison is getting there too. one day, as i was wearing it, i realized with growing horror that i am actually feeling nauseated with its scent. :-(
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